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30 thoughts on my 30th birthday

Hey guys!

Today, I turn 30! Many people warned me that turning 30 might not feel too great. Apparently it can feel like a very official rite of passage into old-town. Honestly, I’ve had a couple of moments of realising that I’m getting older – mainly on an energy level – but, overall, I’m so excited to finally be 30! I feel like I’ve been 30 for a long time… if that makes any sense.

To celebrate, I want to share some lessons I’ve learned throughout my 30 years.



  1. Relationships are about balance. You’ve got to give and you’ve got to take.
  2. People express love in different ways. Their way may not be your preferred method, but that doesn’t mean they don’t love you.
  3. No matter how well-meaning your intention, you cannot change anyone. Meet others as they are.
  4. I am not effective at taking care of others if I don’t take care of myself first.
  5. Sometimes the people who are the most abusive towards us are the ones we love. Be truthful about what is not okay for you.
  6. Criticism can only be received when given with love.
  7. When love moves from emotion to choice, you’re onto something really special.
  8. It is okay to love someone and not like some of their behaviour.


  1. My health is my responsibility; not my doctor’s, not my parent’s, not my partner’s… mine.
  2. Listen to your body; it will tell you what it needs.
  3. Perfection is a myth. Be okay with “good enough”.
  4. Life hurts. Talk about it with someone you trust.
  5. It’s true that our bodies change as we get older. Don’t restrict yourself, just buy new jeans!
  6. The people who drain your energy affect your health. Find a way to manage them: say “no”/have others around to act as buffers/rest.
  7. Your emotions are physical experiences. Give them space.
  8. Pain is a language. Don’t panic. Listen to it. Breathe.
  9. There is no one-size-fits-all prescription to a healthy body. Be in tune with yourself. You are your best guide.
  10. There is no such thing as a health issue being solely psychological or purely physical. There is no separation between our physical and our psychological selves. All aspects of our selves need to be seen.

Personal philosophy:

  1. In such a chaotic world, where there are few guiding principles, it is important to stand firm in your values. Know yourself.
  2. A rewarding act is to help another succeed. Another’s success does not mean your failure. There is space for all of us to bloom.
  3. When we gossip it only helps us to momentarily feel better about ourselves. Compassion and empathy forms connections and helps people heal.
  4. Don’t be in a rush to make money. Put energy into being of value to your clients. Money will come.
  5. If you wait for the perfect moment, you’ll miss it.
  6. Money isn’t worth anything if you’ve burned bridges to make it and if you don’t spend it with intention.
  7. Commitment limits our options but increases our satisfaction.
  8. No matter how bad things get, there is always something to be grateful for.
  9. An obstacle is all-encompassing if you focus on it too closely. When you step back to view the bigger picture, you’ll see that the “obstacle” is only taking up part of the space.
  10. Big decision to make? Sleep on it.
  11. One of the greatest causes of unhappiness is giving too much importance to the space between expectation and reality.
  12. The graph of life looks like a heartbeat monitor: up and down. A straight line means you’re dead.


With love,


Published by

Emma Hogg, Founder of A Life I Choose

Hi! I'm Emma. I’m a psychotherapist who lives, breathes and eats the science of joyfulness, wellness and achievement. All the work I do is fuelled by my deep wish to belong to a world where people actively choose their lives! A person without choice is an unhappy individual. A person who passionately and resiliently lives their purpose experiences joy and fulfilment daily. If you’re like me and you see that the more people are consciously engaging in life, the happier our world will be, then we need you to be a beacon of this message by living it! My blog is one of my ways of creating dialogue with you, so that together, we can have a greater impact on our world. x

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